Or Slownan the Borebarian which I feel would have been a more apt title for this film. I can’t begin to describe how really bad I think this film is. From the cringeworthy opening shot of Conan’s dad (played by Ron Perlman) holding his newborn CGI baby son aloft, after cutting it from his wife’s womb in the middle of a battle no less, to the drab ending sequence and all the confusing, story less points inbetween the two, Conan is a total waste of time. The film looks good and that’s about the best thing I can say about it. I felt as though it was trying to copy, very unsuccesfully, TV’s ‘Game of Thrones’ (the adult Conan is played by Game of Thrones’ Jason Momoa who plays Khal Drogo in the series) having grand sets and scenes but failing to provide any story or structure or anything even remotely gripping to go along with it. Arnold Schwarzenegger, who played Conan twice in the 1980s gave the definitive portrayal of the character so watch either of those films to see how it should be done ( though ‘Barbarian’ is superior to ‘Destroyer’). Had I not paid £6 ($9.71) for a ticket I would have left early. I feel sorry for the cast (especially Ron Perlman who’s excellent as Hellboy) who try their hardest but cannot make such a dire mess work. So in short, if you’re thinking of going to see this film, go see something else instead. Thanks for reading.
The film is dumb, hackneyed and, well, just plain bad – much like the 1982 original – but because it knows and makes fun of that, it plays for a smart and entertaining ride. Good Review! Check out my review when you can!
Hi,
Sorry for late reply. Thanks for your comment and reading my blog, it’s much appreciated. If Conan is ever remade it should only be done as you’ve said above-being knowingly bad and maiking fun of that-will be glad to read your review.
Dan